“I Don’t Need a Break” and Other Dementia Care Excuses We Need to Rethink

senior many hugging caregiver
Learn why it’s important to take a second look at any excuses behind getting help with dementia care.


“You can make it, but it’s easier if you don’t have to do it alone.” – Betty Ford

We all realize that no one person is an island, something that especially rings true when it comes to dementia care. Yet many family caregivers falter with regards to asking for or accepting the assistance they need. As a result, stress is exacerbated as there’s little or no time for self-care – an essential feature for any person in a caregiving role.

Why are we frequently so resolved to tackle such an extraordinary undertaking independently? The following are several common reasons and exactly why we need to rethink them:

  • I am doing just fine on my own; I don’t need a break. To put it simply, science disagrees! A study shared in the American Journal of Geriatric Psychiatry found that a specific stress hormone was depleted in caregivers whose stress was chronic and prolonged – such as in providing Alzheimer’s care independently – while those who engaged just two days per week of respite achieved an increase in the hormone in addition to a brighter outlook and elevated mood.
  • Mom would not want somebody else taking care of her. A lot of us would resist if we were told that someone was coming over to bathe us. But having someone come and help with housework and meals is a good strategy to introduce a new caregiver, working your way up to additional necessary services once the caregiver is known and accepted. The phrasing you utilize will make all the difference as well. Having a “salon day” sounds far more inviting, for example.
  • It’s too complicated to try to find a caregiver I will be able to trust. At Golden Harmony, we background check and professionally train all of our caregivers, confirming key character traits such as reliability, kindness, flexibility, and much more. Golden Harmony is bonded and insured for your further peace of mind. We also meticulously match each senior with the ideal caregiver who will be most compatible. Finally, if a senior’s primary caregiver is sick or on vacation, we will provide an equally qualified replacement caregiver.
  • No one else could care for Mom like I do. While you are certainly not replaceable, the objective of enlisting help is not replacement, but respite. A senior loved one with dementia can benefit from the socialization provided by someone other than yourself, while you gain the benefit of a much-needed break – ultimately allowing you to provide better care to the senior when you return.

If you’d like to explore in-home dementia care for someone you love, connect with Golden Harmony, the experts in elder care in Raleigh, NC and the surrounding areas. Our comprehensively trained, creative, experienced, and compassionate caregivers are here to help you reduce stress, improve life for the older adult you love, and provide you with the chance for self-care. Reach out to us at 919-426-7522 to get started!